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1. Which is better: the Big Wheel or the Green Machine?
The Big Wheel, of course!
The Green Machine is far superior!
What about that little green inchworm? (see question #7)
2. If they still made adult-sized Big Wheels, which sadly they do not, would you ride one?
No, I no longer feel the need to have fun.
Yes, but only if someone paid me.
They made those!! Man! I missed out!
3. Please tell us about one of your favorite childhood toys:
4. How do you feel about Jack-in-the-Boxes?
They're wonderful. Surprise!
They should make a naked one.
5. On a scale of 1 - 10, with 10 being the most, how much fun did you have as a child?
6. Did you ever have a Barbie?
Yes. I loved it and took great care of it.
No, but I played with my sister's.
Yes, and I cut it's hair and/or gave it tattoos.
Barbies are only fun for about 5 minutes.
7. During your childhood, how satisfied were you with the following?
The quality of your toys
The quality of your best friend's toys
The amount of money your parents spent on your toys.
Did you ever have one of these?
8. When would you like to see me?
On this day:
Every day, starting this day:
Never, starting this day:
9. Please provide us your contact info. so we can bombard you with advertisements:
Address Line 1:
Address Line 2:
"The people in the village were real poor, so none of the children had any toys. But this one little boy had gotten an old enema bag and filled it with rocks, and he would go around and whap the other children across the face with it. Man, I think my heart almost broke. Later the boy came up and offered to give me the toy. This was too much! I reached out my hand, but then he ran away. I chased him down and took the enema bag. He cried a little, but that's the way of these people." - Jack Handy